Have you ever had so much going on that your mind was like 1000 internet tabs being open? I am in that place right now.

I have so much going on that I have no idea if I am coming or going.

I have so much extra stress that I feel I am one more tab opening to a mental breakdown. Life has just gotten out of control.

I have a booth I am working on. I have a book that is requiring me to make decisions I feel I cannot make. I have people left and right that need things and then, there is me and what I need.

I literally could not proofread the manuscript after all changes were made because the first chapter put me into such an emotional disarray I felt I would fall down into the dark place no one wants to go. I know the story and, I just couldn't read it. But, I have faith in my editor.

I also have a booth I am working on and feel that I need more time in the day to get it together.

I developed a fear of guns that is out of this world and felt I would go into full panic mood when having to touch one.

I have classes I am taking and they are stressing me out too, mainly because its hard to do the required stuff when it is all online and shouldn't be. Now I know how homeschooled kids feel that are used to a classroom setting.

I just want to wake up and it be early morning 11/11/2015 and I can make different choices and keep my girl here but, I know it is not possible.

So, I will try to close those tabs one at a time and pray that the good Lord keeps me from that dark place. The place this time there will be no returning from.

Life, it happens but does it have to happen all at once and full force?

1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he careth for you."