Healing after child loss takes lots and lots of time but, it also takes patience of those around you.
Sometimes, as a friend of mine today mentioned (and it is something I have said over and over), you have to change to heal. Change things, you name it.
Not everyone that has lost a child heals or grieves the same. I know Lezlie is up there telling me to suck it up but, I cannot at the moment and, I know she knows my heart.
I have found on this journey that not everyone will stay with you and if change is a part of healing, losing people may be the change needed.
You cannot continue doing the same thing that isn't helping you heal.
Healing starts within and sometimes it requires you to do things that you honestly are scared to do but, you need to do.
I have felt that I have been limited in my healing and its because I need to first, make sure the relationship I have with God is one needed and, change things.
I have sat and debated on what to do to make this healing start and, I have finally realized CHANGE is needed.
I don't expect anyone that hasn't lost a child to know my feelings.
I realize and have always told people everyone is fighting a battle but sometimes those of us fighting an older battle are forgotten. Why? Not sure but, it sucks to downplay our grief as it would anyone else. But, it is done. I lost my sweet girl almost 4 years ago but, it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt just as bad today. But, healing is something that I may never do completely but, I need to try to do it a little.
Psalm 10:17 "Lord, you know the hopes of the helpless. Surely you will hear their cries and comfort them."
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