Tired..

Life can make you tired. Even if you have a few days off, you can still just be tired.

I realized today, I am tired. But not sleepy tired.

Sometimes I just get to where I am so tired of everything because I just get overwhelmed with everything going on and regardless if it is good, great or awesome, you suddenly realize you are tired of life.

Now, I can honestly say it has been a while since I have truly felt this tired or everything. But, I think the fact that there is so much going on, it has me so overwhelmed I realize that maybe it is to much and then, it hits me. Nah, you are just tired.

Yes, I realize satan can play a big part in how things are perceived but, I also know that sometimes life gives you so much grief, you cannot see the bigger picture. You do not see the good that could come. All you see is what you don't have and, what you are missing. You do not see the things God is putting in front of you or the people still there, you see what is not there. You get so tired of trying to be normal without that one thing and, you just feel this is enough.

Honestly, I can say that grief will hit you so hard and it makes you physically and mentally ill. You will feel so bad that you feel you are done, finished, all that jazz. It hits you out of nowhere. I takes your breathe away because the truth is this new normal, regardless of it being 1 year or 10, sucks.

Just like it sucks the life out of you.

But, I cannot sit and say that it is easy to overcome that feeling, it isn't.

As much as I preach to people to remember God has you and to keep your faith, I am probably the worlds worst at taking anyones advice. Literally, I am hardheaded.

This is a setback and as always, it has the mind doing what the mind does, overthinking, overanalyzing and overused.

Maybe this too shall pass. There is always tomorrow.......

2 Timothy 4:7 " I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."