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When you cannot say Goodbye....

The absolute hardest thing you will ever do is say goodbye to your child. I do not mean when they move out, go to college, stay at a friends house no, I mean when they are taken from this world way too soon.

Someone asking you to just let it go (we aren't like Elsa) or, get over it obviously has never ever lost a child. We forgive your ignorance but from here on out never say these things to us, EVER. You will lose your friend card, etc. Trust me. I have pulled quite a few.

I don't think I will ever truly say Goodbye to Lezlie. Honestly I believe it is because for one, I still cannot believe she is gone and secondly, I will see her again. Therefore, no goodbye is needed.

We all know death is a part of life. Lets just put that out there. We have to realize this. We are supposed to accept it but when it comes to your child, thats a much harder thing to do. So we will just leave that out right now. One thing you never realize with death is how long it takes to recover.

Forever! I said this yesterday.

But, as the title stays - when you don't want to say goodbye, you don't have too.

There are many things you can do to keep their memories alive. Post pictures to fb or social media every day. Set up a memory table at your house. You can even put a prayer candle with it. Make a quilt with their t shirts. Finish things they were working on. I actually finished a book Lezlie was reading, I actually read it to her - in the summer heat sitting at her headstone. Always keep their grave well tended and bring flowers. I do this. Make a scrapbook of their life. Get a tattoo of their name or their handwriting, I have done this and even have a picture of her and her favorite shoes, her best friends name, and I will stop there. Plant a tree. My Aunt Lisa actually had a magnolia planted in her memory. I know exactly where it is on I-20 in Vicksburg. Read their favorite books. Listen to their favorite music. Wear their favorite perfume (or cologne). Plant a garden and decorate it to their liking. Always remember them during life events. Sing their favorite songs. Download their playlist. Have something they have written framed. I could go on and on but, you don't have to say goodbye.

There are days that it is so hard for me to even get out of bed let alone go to work, etc. But, I know that making her proud and living a life of purpose and keeping her in it, well that would make her happy. Regardless of how I feel, I go on. You can too.

Hebrews 6:19 "Hope is an anchor for the soul."

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The righteous perish, and no one takes it to heart;  the devout are taken away, and no one understands that the righteous are taken away to be spared from evil.  Those who walk uprightly enter into peace, they find rest as they lie in death.

Isaiah 57:1-2

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