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How to be a friend....

You know, it is so hard to be a grieving parent. We didn't ask for this.

It is hard to understand the thoughts racing through our minds, 90 to nothing almost all the time.

What do we want from a friend?

Support. If you can be there during the darkest to times, do it. Be there. Presence of a true friend is a gift of love and you know what, it helps the aching heart, mind and even the soul.

Call or text. Leave a message. Sometimes we just cannot answer the phone.

Send an email, a note or a card. Heartfelt messages mean the most. If you do not know how to word it, just let us know you are thinking about us, praying for us but never say it is okay or we will get over it.

Realize we lost our child.

Realize our pain cannot be measures.

Share memories you have with us.

Do not be silent through this process. We hurt daily and we cry daily. We cannot move on so do not suggest it.


Be there 100% for us. I know that as time passes you aren't expected to be with us physically every day but, send a text. Leave a voice mail. Remember us and our babies. Be a friend.

Support is needed and too often people fade away, we do not need that. We just need the reassurance of a text every now and then as time passes that you are there if we need you. We do not need people to constantly try and make us feel bad for not texting first. We also do not need the are you mad texts.

We are grieving and we will never be the same.

Job 11:18 "You will feel safe for there is hope."

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The righteous perish, and no one takes it to heart;  the devout are taken away, and no one understands that the righteous are taken away to be spared from evil.  Those who walk uprightly enter into peace, they find rest as they lie in death.

Isaiah 57:1-2

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